peer pressure

Peer pressure! What is it? Why is it such an important issue? Why do kids and teenagers give in to peer pressure? Well, I would like to tell you about an incident that had happened to me and I would(will) try to answer these questions.

Friday night, I find myself walking to a party in someone's house. I have never seen this guy, but I entered his house. There was a lot of Alcohol. And many of my friends drank. My friends tried to make (me) drink, but I didn’t do that. I have drunk in my life, and it's(gr. - use the past) one of my worst experiences. So I said NO and felt I was doing the right thing.

So what is it(מיותר) peer pressure?-(start a new sentence) peer pressure is when people in(מיותר) your age or level are trying to influence you. This influence may be good or bad. In my age, peer pressure is playing(gr.) an important part in life. It starts in dressing up, through obesity and diets, cutting lessons, drinking alcohol, smoking cigarettes and even using drug(s). Children, teenagers and adults all want to look "good" and be "the man"(phr.).

We all know, even from the first grade, that cigarettes are bad,(Start a new sentence) they are (the) number one cause of lung cancer, but teenagers still destroying(gr.) their lives and smoke this junk. Should I destroy my life and insert (into) my body a killer because my friends say it's cool? The answer is NO.

I hope you to(מיותר) do(ww.) the right decision(This sentence doesn't belong here). to conclude everything I would like to give you some recommendations:(avoid making lists. You can give the same advice in a differe way: "First, if you are popular.....Second, if you think you are......." and so on)
1. If you are popular and people walk after you- use your huge power for doing good thing(s).
2. If you think you are under stress(מיותר) pressure- think about your life and decide what's more important.
3. If you did something that destroying lives(phr. and gr.)- stop, later you'll not be able to do this.
4. Alcohol and drugs are not a solution for many problems- They sell you an illusion and after the effect is over you feel like garbage juice(phr.).
5. I hope you to learn from me to(and) say- No
6. Peer pressure is power- Don't let people use it badly on you!!!
Please reorganize your last paragraph into a regular written paragraph without the list. You make very good points but you need to rewrite them in a different way.
(80)
Daphna.